Ok, we’re going to give this another shot today. High noon for blood draw, Physician Assistant visit, then off to the Infusion Suite. It will take about 3 hours for both drugs to be dripped through an IV. They will take it very slow today and explain everything as they go because it is the first time.
Please pray that my body will tolerate the drugs well and that I won’t have an allergic reaction. I am armed with all sorts of nausea meds and meds for the other end as well :-)
Yesterday I listened to a message from Pastor John Piper on a verse from Ephesians that I’ve been meditating on:
“and what is the immeasureable greatness of his power toward us who believe” Eph. 1:19
The opening illustration in this message about why we might not believe this statement, why we might not “feel” it is our experience was about drugs and medicine we take for our health. He said something to the effect that we won’t understand the power of the drugs or rejoice in their effect if we don’t understand the severity of the illness. I was amazed at yet again the Spirit of God directing me to something for the peace of my heart.
I have been resistent to chemo; I don’t want to do it. I hear stories of women who’ve gone through it 4 or so times; ladies in remission for 5 years and then it comes back again. So what’s the use?
The Spirit of God gently told me to look at my disease, my cancer. Even though everyone says it is not a death sentence, it is still cancer. It is dangerous, it is deadly if left unchecked, it destroys, it is serious. So I must come to this reality in order to rejoice in the toxic, harsh drugs that I must take to fight off this incredibly invasive, powerful disease. I must fight it with a greater power. I find myself more willing to engage in the process now. It wasn’t pleasant to face reality. But it has given me new appreciation for chemo drugs; for research doctors; for those who hate disease and spend countless hours looking for cure. And by God’s grace, they are finding ways to fight it.
The message is good. Here’s the link: http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/the-immeasurable-greatness-of-his-power-toward-us
You don’t have to listen to much to hear this illustration. If you like, listen to the rest. I was convicted and encouraged. My sin nature is destructive and dangerous. I must face the reality of my bent to sin and it’s power to destroy me if I am to know the immeasureable power of God toward me. Any freedom from sin, any movement toward loving God and others is an evidence of this power.
Thanks for reading. Thanks for praying. Thanks for walking with me even if you are miles away. Thanks for thinking of me, calling, texting, commenting on the blog. We read each one and are blessed.
Grace to you,
Jane & marc
On the Greisen Side of Life 
Thank you for your words of encouragement and for the reminder about the destructiveness of my sin. I’m looking forward to listening to that sermon. Praying for you today. Val
“But I have trusted in your steadfast love…”
Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world. Focus on Jesus and how much he loves you. You are his precious daughter and he has given some amazing tools to fight the disease. You may be through the first round of chemo when you read this. We are praying. Mom
Thanks, Jane and Marc, for your transparency during this journey. It is in the dark valleys that our faith really needs to matter. The Word is our Rock when our world is shaking. You will both have a whole new revelation of Him when you come out of this season. It is so strengthening for all of us to see His specific answer to your heart’s cry, Jane! We rejoice with you!
WOW! What a good word! Praying that we will know Resurrection Power now to fight the battles of today…..